This little piggy went to Prada,

This little piggy went to Cannes,

This little piggy dined at Nobu,

And this little piggy, Hakkasan.

And this little piggy went 'Wee wee wee wee!'

All the way home because she had a fat bottom!

* * *

Louis Vuitton, Louis Vuitton,

Mulberry, Mulberry?

Nappy bag dilemma – Lulu, Kate or Anya?

Shopping spree, buy all three.

* * *

There was a young woman who lived in her Choos,

though she once had a house in a smart Chelsea Mews.

So much on Jimmy,

The house had to go,

And with it, her Amex and husband in tow!

* * *

Pussycat, pussycat, where have you been?

I've been to London to see McQueen,

Pussycat, pussycat, what did you there?

I bought the collection and kissed lots of air.

* * *

Twinkle, twinkle, diamond ring,

In a blue box tied with string.

Tiffany's new princess cut,

Twice the size of baby's butt.

Twinkle twinkle, show your spark,

Can't change nappies in the dark.

* * *